How to Pick Up a Girl in Tel-Aviv
(Translated from the Hebrew: מדריך תל־אביב מקוצר: איך להתחיל עם בחורה, by Chanoch Levin)
In a coffee shop; Friday, after lunch
[A young man approaches a girl sitting alone in a coffee shop and sits on her]
Girl: Excuse me, but you're sitting on me![The waiter approaches]
Man: Waiter! I hear that you have talking seats?
Waiter: That's not a seat - it's a lady.[to the girl]
Man: So why don't you use seats!?
Waiter: We do use them, only you've sat upon a lady by mistake...
Man: Fine, fine! Bring me a cup of tea and stop screwing with my brain! Women and seats!
The waiters here, I'm telling you!... What's your name?